Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Old man fashioning a kayak out of a log???

Last Saturday, snow took a rather large branch off of our maple tree in the backyard. This has happened a few times before, but this time it decided to land on the power lines to our home. I woke up, looked out the window and there it was in all its majesty leaning against my power lines. I was surprised to discover that even though it had fallen on and was leaning on the power lines, we still had power and phone and everything.

Well, I called the power company and asked if they’d come out and take care of it, which they did, but in the process, they broke the phone line. So we had the phone company come out, but they really don’t matter in this story. The focus of this blog is the tree that caused the problem.

When we bought our home, it is an older home, it had a few big beautiful trees in the yard. One being this maple in the backyard. Over the past couple of years, this tree has started to die. In fact last year, the entire south side didn’t grow any leaves and the bark started to come off. The problem we have is that the tree sits between power lines, so any effort by myself to try to remove this tree would be dangerous and stupid.

Well, when the power company saw this tree and realized it posed a threat to their power lines, they decided, with our permission (and gratitude) that the tree had to go.

Monday morning, the tree cutters showed up and began to cut it down. When they had taken care of most of it, they cut the last bit of the trunk off at the base so all they had left was a log about 10-15 feet long and about 2 feet in diameter. They started to cut up this log, and apparently there were a lot of nails in it or something, because they had problems. Well, they told my wife that they were having problems and they were going to leave this log. She didn’t want to argue with them so she agreed, and they left.

Now, by my calculations, a log of that size weighs in the area of 1500 – 2500 pounds, and I don’t have a chainsaw. Even if I did, if these pros had problems with it what chance in the world do I have. So now I have a giant log in my backyard, that I am unable to budge, there’s no way to get a truck in my backyard, and I’m completely clueless as to what to do about it. I’ve called the city and so far gotten nowhere. So tell me what you think I should do with it. The idea to fashion a kayak came from the Wayne’s World 2 quote in the title, but let me know if anyone comes up with any better ideas.

1 comment:

  1. Blow it up.

    Or, if you're more patient, you can cut it down a little at a time. I'd start by using an ax to hack a slit in the top (what was the side) and slide a wedge into it. Every time you have some time, take a sledghammer to the wedge. It will eventually split.

    It's also possible that the tree-cutting guys were just lazy and it doesn't really have any problems.

    A final suggestion is that I think Eric Altom does tree removal. He might be able to give you some ideas.

    Good luck